Sometimes Anxiety Feels Like This

Living with Anxiety

I was 24-years-old and something I cared about went away. It was sudden and unwavering. This could be anything depending on the person. A job, relationship, project, sport team, television show…it doesn’t matter. For me, it was my band. My point here is that a void had been created. A place where I invested myself, my time and my pride was no longer there. Simply put, I was lost. And within a month, I wasn’t myself as I began feeling things that I’ve never felt before.

2006 Symptoms

  • Heart palpitations.
  • Limb numbness.
  • Digestion issues.
  • Weight loss. (I dropped 20 pounds in 4 weeks. This was very concerning.)
  • Loss of appetite. (Clearly.)
  • Loss of concentration.
  • Inability to communicate. (Severe at times.)
  • Loss of passion.
  • Loss of energy.
  • Unexplainable pains. (Mostly in my chest, ribs and stomach.)

I was a complete mess and I had no clue what was wrong with me. Because it was 2006, I called upon WebMD (which is an anxiety wonderland in itself). Unable to pin all of my symptoms to any one thing, I naturally steered toward the worst case. Which is how I diagnosed myself with this phantom stomach illness. After all, the weight loss and digestion issues were the most worrisome of my symptoms at the time. But again, there wasn’t anything wrong with my stomach. It was something different.

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This is Winter in 2013

Frozen Pier
View Set Photos

Admittedly, my Instagram account has made me an incredibly lazy photographer. It’s sad. But it does make sense. Taking photos on a device that fits in my pocket, weighs 5x less than a lens and is connected to the internet pretty convenient. Not to mention, it’s nearly impossible to take a bad photo with all of those beautiful filters (I recall spending hours in Photoshop to get that perfect “Toaster” effect) on standby! And nothing compares to the instant gratification of a friendly comment seconds after posting an image.

Still, there is something to be missed about looking through a viewfinder and lugging around an overpriced camera. So this week I rescued my D90 from ho-hum product photos of spandex suits, or ugly sweaters, and went for a refreshing winter walk.

I adventured from my apartment, through a wintry Lincoln Park and over to a frozen Lake Michigan. I hope you enjoy the photos.

Until next time, I sincerely wish you good physical health, mental health and genuine happiness.

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Dluzen’s Picks: Art Chicago/NEXT 2011

Originally posted on Chicago Art Magazine by Robin Dluzen.

A lot has already been said and written on the topic of this year’s Art Chicago/NEXT fairs: the notable absences, the drastic decrease in size, the business practices, and so on. However, I found it was still possible, amongst all the showiness and gimmickry that the fairs inevitably attract, to narrow down a few booths containing works by artists, in my opinion, deserving of recognition for managing to uphold quality amidst the circumstances.

Corbett vs. Dempsey, Chicago

Walter Hamady, "Box 113/ The Mormon Tabernacle/ not everything is possible at every time."

Corbett vs. Dempsey gallery not surprisingly presents the works of Walter Hamady as straddling the line between the high art market of Chicago, and its roots in the everyday and the tradition of craftsmanship. The artist’s works become more delightful with the accompanying background narratives, however, outside of those stories, Hamady’s works so clearly stand on their own formally, conceptually and aesthetically as art objects.

The artist books and book-like assemblages employ pleasingly patina-ed found objects, sheaves of paper and expended cigar boxes, highlighting their deliberate oddness, and their material narrative. Continue reading

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Pillow Talk

Bailey Dee (left) – Musician

I have a handful of talented musician friends, so choosing just one to feature this week was no easy task. Bailey is certainly one of the most well-rounded musicians I know and is seemingly always active. She’s currently playing in Pillow Talk, a self-proclaimed “cutesy, over the top, blow your brains out rockabilly” group from Chicago.

You can also catch her with The Rust Belt Ramblers — also in Chicago. Yet, some of my favorite stuff from Bailey is her solo tracks that she tosses up on her blog from time to time.

Listenable Links

This is part 4 of my “Week for Friends” blog series.

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Original Hand Made

Kristin – Owner, Designer of Original Hand Made

I’ve worked with Kristin before and can say, with great confidence, that she is one of the most creative and driven people I know. Original Hand Made , a completely unique collection of hand made satchels, clutches and hand bags made from vintage ties, is a gem just waiting to explode.

Definitely do check it out.

Shop Original Hand Made

This is part 3 of my “Week for Friends” series.

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